written by Divine’s ink
I came out of the house and quickly fumbled the clothes out of my bag. I needed to see Karen and Chuma but not like this. I looked at my dressing one more time. It was a long black flay skirt and a long sleeve gray top. I also had my cornrows carefully wrapped in a turban.
So awful! I needed not to be told that I wasn’t meant to be seen outside like this. “If that Ada of a girl or maybe Lola sees me, my rep would finally be over”, saying that I got to the abandoned building beside my house and quickly changed my dressing.
As I took few steps, the glances I got was enough assurance that I made the right choice. The ripped jeans and the peach crop top, plus the lovely human hair I recently ordered online.
My phone buzzed, of course the second phone Chuma got me. The one Dad and Mum got me only had their numbers and church member’s numbers in them. “Dee, are you still coming?” was all I could hear before I replied Karen to say that I was on my way.
I flagged down the next available motorcycle. I didn’t want Dad to come out and see me dressed like that besides if I was really going for choir rehearsal then I ought to have gone since.
I got to Karen’s place and after few minutes, my boyfriend Chuma and Karen’s boyfriend, Tony came over. They were both friends.
It was the only way I could spend quality time with Chuma. Playing board games, cooking, dancing and singing together. Chuma really liked me and usually didn’t go farther than kissing me.
According to him, he really wanted to meet my parents and get to court me properly. But I just couldn’t. My both parents were pastors in our church and due to the high position they held, I was expected to adhere to the rules of the church hence my dress sense restriction and my inability to bring my boyfriend home.
I had tried on several occasions to bring up conversations about my dressing to my mum. I even tried asking about bringing the opposite sex home if the fellow was interested in dating me. After all, I was a graduate and it wasn’t bad if I had a relationship now.
Mum’s reply was, “Deborah, you can never be tired of dressing like this. It’s the same way I dress in fact it is what is required from the church. Remember the daughter of whom you are and let that constantly guide your thoughts”.
She continued about the boyfriend thing, “You have to lead by example. People are watching you, what do you think they will say if they hear you’re following a man up and down? God will reveal the right person to us and of course he’ll be a godly brother. When that time comes, you guys would then go under the marriage committee for proper tutelage”.
I was really furious that day. I only wanted to be a normal child. Not a pastor’s daughter. I loved God but this was too much for me. I hated the fact that I had to change my clothes in the uncompleted building outside. I hated the fact that I had to dress so poorly to church. Other ladies that weren’t pastor’s daughters didn’t have that much burden on them. They dressed beautifully to church. I wanted my parents to know I had a boyfriend. It was a very frustrating thought for me.
However since my parents weren’t going to allow me show my real self, I was going to continue living my double life. I would continue to please my parents with what they wanted but that wasn’t going to stop me from doing the things I wanted too. I was after all obeying the scripture where it says, “give to Caeser what belongs to Caeser…”
Divine’s flowing ink